@suehiro.

[pricelesstears]

[ Jouno has been awake for a little while now, though his senses haven't returned. From what he understands, it might take up to a week for them to come back entirely. It's a vulnerable state to be in, and Jouno isn't fond of it. He hesitates, even, to see those close to him; if there's anything he truly despises, it's appearing to be weak.

And weak is exactly what he feels like right now.

Despite how terrible he's been to her since her hire, Takemi has been taking better care of Jouno than he'd expected. He's pretty sure he's babbled to her about some embarrassing things while under the influence of pain killers, but he doesn't want to think about that. Still, because she is who he's seen most, it's her that he expects to come through the door.

Normally, Jouno would be able to tell Tetcho by the sound of his footsteps alone, but as it is, he can hardly hear them. Instead, the quiet sound barely alerts him to the presence of someone else. Instead, it's the blurry vision of a shadow entering the room that tells him someone is there at all.

For once, his pure white eyes are open wide. ]

Doctor...? I said I was fine.

Comments

[suehiro]

[ there is a flicker of confusion at the request but tetcho is nothing if not accommodating with jouno's requests; he speaks up, as if he were addressing anyone else without superhearing. ] Jouno, it's me. [ ...which, duh, tetcho.

the distance feels long as concern grows and tetcho is now standing by the bed, a hand falling to rest on jouno's wrist and giving a squeeze. this is still the same, he's never been shy about touching jouno as much as he wants and is allowed to get away with. sometimes it is subtle, but it is always greedy for any sliver of affection jouno is willing to give.

and he's back to staring at the eyes. like a besotted fool. ]

Sorry I wanted to be here before but I wasn't allowed.

[pricelesstears]

Yes, I got that the first time. [ There's some of Jouno's usual hostility in his voice, but overall, he simply sounds tired.

He's aware that there is a hand on his wrist -- he can see the shadow of the movement as Tetcho takes it -- but it feels like almost nothing. It's disquieting; he wants to be touched by Tetcho right now. Tetcho's touch is normally comforting, calming.

Jouno feels anything but calm. ]

It's fine. [ It isn't. Jouno doesn't like that the doctor felt the need to keep Tetcho away, but there's little he can do about it. ]

I don't... like this, Tetcho.

[ The lack of senses... It's worse than when they were digging around in his guts. At least he can't feel the pain of that at the moment. ]

Come sit with me.

[suehiro]

I know, I told her it would be better if I'm allowed to stay as long as you need but she insists it will be bad for your recovery. [ not that he intends to respect the visiting hours, he's going to come back even if he gets kicked out. he's just that sort of person now, he guesses...breaking all the rules for jouno. justice is just... not as important as jouno.

he sits on the bed, his free hand moving to touch jouno's earlobe, tracing it lightly. ] What is wrong?

All she said was that your procedure was different and you'd need longer to recover but... [ did that have to do with the fact jouno isn't hearing as well? and... those eyes.




tetcho please stop being weird and staring so much at jouno's face. ]

[pricelesstears]

[ Jouno wants Tetcho to stay, but in the long run, he doesn't think that it's for the best either. They still have their missions, things they need to accomplish. Tetcho cannot fixate on Jouno as he has in the past. ]

Stop staring at me. I can... see it. [ Barely, but the shadow of Tetcho's face is clearly directly turned towards him. As if to make sure he's right, Jouno reaches up and brushes his fingers over Tetcho's cheek. ]

It was similar to yours, I believe, but I was unconscious for that part. [ He'd, fortunately, slept through the worst of being opened up. The part he had been awake for, though, had been little more than torture. ]

They had a drug they wanted to test. [ He'd been right about being a guinea pig, it felt like. ] It improved senses, but... everything is backwards now. I couldn't hear at all when I woke up, and I still have no sense of smell.

[ He runs a finger over Tetcho's jawline. He may not be able to feel more than a light touch himself, but it's better than nothing. ]

The drug would be more successful for torture than for using on us. [ He forces a smile. ] Do you think they'd give it to me?

[suehiro]

Ha? [ jouno can see him? tetcho leans against the touch on his cheek without second thought; he's starved for it, as always. you don't spend six years in love with someone, then some sleeping with them and finally realise your feelings without there being some changes. he let's jouno touch as he likes, processing slowly what is being said.

when it came to his surgery, he'd accepted it. wanted it just done and over with and— but he can understand jouno's fury. tetcho's jaw clenches. he's torn between wanting to comfort jouno and going out there to kill every single person—


the impulse is not new but... tetcho is the type of person who will be righteous until the day he is not, and is there nothing worse than someone who runs out of faith? ] Jouno... [ he grabs the hand on his face and turns his palm against his mouth, reverent as always. a loving gesture and a promise. ] If they try this on you again, I will kill them.

[pricelesstears]

[ The thing about Tetcho's words is that Jouno doesn't doubt them at all. There's no telling what he would have done to Kenji if he'd won that battle, and all of that had been for Jouno's sake as well. ]

Don't be stupid.

[ He sighs, tilting his head to the side. ]

I survived, didn't I? [ It's easy to say, to act like he isn't bothered. To act like this hadn't been a reminder of what it had felt like to die. ] So calm down. I should be back to normal in a week.

[ If he isn't, he doesn't know what he'll do. ]

[suehiro]

[ he would've tortured kenji and killed him, tetcho knows- then he would've gone through the entire agency just to find jouno. it's not moral, it's not kind and it isn't justice; tetcho would most likely still pick the same. ]

And when I survived mine, you wanted to kill them too. [ yup, he will do it if they try again and, if jouno doesn't get better? well, then he just might do it then instead.

his look goes flat, displeased. jouno can be the rational one here, tetcho will always cut the shortest, most direct path to what he wants. even if that is the head of someone two rooms over.

but he concedes that there will be no killing now because instead, he's touching jouno's face with the back of his hand, knuckles along his cheek. those eyes... ]

You're pretty.

[pricelesstears]

[ Jouno huffs in annoyance. Tetcho is right. He'd wanted to torture Takemi for what she had done. He still did, to a degree, even though she'd been the one to help take care of him after the surgery. He doubts that she's entirely responsible for what is being done to them, but... ]

Yes, but that wasn't rational. [ Admitting that isn't fun. Jouno takes pride in being rational always. He has to be the one to hold things together for everyone else, but...

He couldn't deny that he'd let emotion rule his thought process then.

The compliment catches him off guard though, and he blinks, staring in Tetcho's direction momentarily before turning his head to the side to conceal the blush that now dusts his cheeks. ]

And you're an idiot. What are you even saying?

[suehiro]

This is rational. [ anyone who hurts jouno deserves to die; see? all logic here. but tetcho is not going to argue the point further, if it ever comes to him having to kill the doctors for jouno's sake...well, he will worry about it then and not now. especially when jouno is trying to hide the way the blush creeps across his cheeks.

tetcho very deliberately grabs jouno's chin and tries to coax him to look at tetcho. ] I said that you're pretty. [ oh he knows jouno heard, he's just being a pest. ] You are pretty, your eyes are pretty too. Like snow.

And I love you. [ because he will never tire of saying that. ]

[pricelesstears]

[ Jouno likes compliments. He soaks up praise and adoration like a sponge, so he doesn't completely hate what Tetcho is saying. That said, it does fluster him, enough so that his cheeks are a soft red when Tetcho forces him to look his way. There's a slight pout on his lips, and his nose wrinkles in feigned disgust. ]

Don't say stuff like that. [ About his eyes, at least. It's strange. He can't remember the last time anyone saw them, for one. Almost self-conscious, he closes them again -- but he doesn't like being without some sense of his surroundings. It makes him too nervous, and he swallows, and they're open again before long, fixated again on the shadow that is his boyfriend. ]

You sound so dumb. [ His lips quirk slightly, almost a smile. He won't say it, but he loves him, too. Pathetically so. ]

[suehiro]

I am dumb. [ but it is said with a hint of a smile, a warmth in his voice as he draws jouno close enough for a chaste kiss against the corner of his mouth. he knows the surgery takes a toll on the body and he's just glad to be allowed to stay here with jouno for now. ] For all your complaints I think you like that I'm dumb. [ probably exasperates jouno too but... ]

I've never asked how you lost your sight.

[pricelesstears]

Your lack of intelligence is annoying, actually. [ Jouno smiles, though, resting a hand on Tetcho's leg. ] Maybe I'm more of a masochist than I thought, since I seemingly like to be annoyed.

[ The statement makes him pause. Even in his bleary pain killer induced state, he's not sure he wants to talk about it, or at least, not the full details of it. He might not have cared before if Tetcho knew about his past, but seeing him lose faith in him had changed that. Now he's not sure what Tetcho would think, or if it would be too much for him. ]

I got an infection.

[ It isn't a lie. It's simply only part of the story. ]